Getting to know the community

So for financial reasons, I work out at the local YMCA (and because they have an indoor, heated pool which you can't find anywhere in DC) which is a very good place to do your thing, if you do a thing! My only complaint is the the locker assignment process. For some reason every time I exchange my membership ID for a key to the new home for my belongings I find myself right door to the a disrobed older gentleman. EVERY TIME! There will be nobody in the entire locker room but the two of us and without a doubt, we will always end up in the corner, with little room to work, and the other guy is always NAKED!
During the warmer months, there are fans that blow cool air. On one occasion, I walked in on a bald and stout man who's belly looked as if it had been inflated by a bike pump and with one more pump it would explode! He had no hair on his head or hippity hop shapped belly and his skin was a light pink, like freshly spanked baby's bottom. This man turned the fan on himself and was standing necked in front of it with his arms outstretched like he was the lady in Titanic! I imagined standing behind him like Leonardo di Caprio and saying "doesn't it feel like you're flying?"
I quickly shook my head and turned up the music from my ipod in an attempt to get that image out of there!